A couple breaks up. Two months later, the couple finds themselves seeing other people and everything... but STILL, not at all over each other. For weeks, they've had no choice but to talk about everything that went wrong. The blame game continues...
HIM: ...but I've already admitted that I was wrong, and I don't care about what you did wrong. I know I did some things wrong, but I get it. I'll learn to compromise. But I'm saying though -- you're a pain in the ass, too. But you're MY pain in the ass though. I don't care... I love you.
HER: Are you sure about that? Because from what I understand, you hate my guts. I mean, I thought you didn't think we'd be together forever? That's what you said, right? I can't be with somebody who is so different from me -- how would that work? I hate to know that I get on your nerves. I don't want to be another obligation for you. I ain't... I don't... I can't... I will not... You ain't... You shouldn't... I shouldn't... We shouldn't...
Etcetera, etcetera.
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Ladies, how many times have you found yourselves feeling like some guy was feeding you the above... and responding with these same words? You were probably thinking something like... "He saying that shit now, but whatever... he don't mean that shit." You deserve to find and be with the perfect guy, right? Fuccouttaherewiththatbullsheeeit....
I hate to be a bearer of bad news (not really) but any guy in his grown and monkey ass [but] right mind has accepted that there's no such thing as the perfect girl or relationship. Do any of you feel the same? Probably not. Or is that how things work on Venus? Probably so. Shit, go right ahead and tell me that I ain't perfect. That ain't news, because, duhh.... I know I'm not. I know I have my share of idiosyncrasies that bug the hell out of people and I admit to my imperfections. But what I do know is that none of that is enough to jeopardize my ability to be happy with someone. That someone exists, and I know I'm deep/patient enough to find her if I haven't already. And loving me for me is why I'll love her for her. No conditions...
So why be hurt when he wants you to be his pain in the ass and nobody elses? We're just saying what's real.
The sad part is that EVERY guy loathes to one day be in the "but baby, I love you" position. While I equate it with the day that a boy becomes a man, it's also the day that he realizes that some woman [other than his mom or sister] may actually have some pull in his life... and maybe even his heart. Yeah, his dumbassness and decisions probably got him into such a position to begin with -- but no dude will put himself out there like this unless he really loves her and sincerely wants it to work. Undeniably, the biggest mistake guys make is failing to let that "one" know that she is the one. Why? Because, shamefully, what we're better at is showing you all how much you rack our nerves. We express feelings of annoyances better than we express security; we're quietest and implicit when comfortable while loudest and obvious when uncomfortable. That's not good, I know.. but I'm just saying what's REAL. And most of us get that, so what next? Squash the fact we might be partially or fully responsible for the escalation of events leading up to this particular situation-- what are fellas supposed to do when saying "Because I love you "[over and over again] just ain't enough? Beg? Fuck no Absolutely not. A man ain't begging unless there's a ring on it. So do we just let it burn? Letting it burn is definitely and always an option. A man won't real and existing love doesn't burn though because but contrary to popular belief... we too have crazy feelings too that make us stay in love with you. Surely, every other lady has accused her man of not saying "I love you" enough. But when we feel that shit, we feel that shit. And when we finally do say it, it trumps everything. Knowww thattt!! While saying "Because I love you" appears to be our silver bullet for everything , it's a trigger that we do really think hard about before pulling it. We're not going to tell you we do when we don't (we as in grown men, not we as in little boys who say the love you to get laid).
You could be the wrongest of wrong, far from perfect and everything BUT who we imagined being with... but sometimes loving you is all we want, all we need and all that matters. In the male perspective, love speaks louder as a word than it does as an action.Where's the reciprocity for that?
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